Go Girl, Go Potty

A couple of weeks ago, my two oldest sons had the opportunity to play football at PacBell park, during halftime of an UFL (http://www.ufl-football.com/) game. Like most games, I had the opportunity to hang out with the daughters of one of the coaches. It allows me to experience what life would be like with a daughter (albeit for only a couple of hours).

As we tailgated, the boys were busy throwing the football and running amuck. Us girls were standing around impatiently waiting to enter the stadium, when my faux daughter suddenly had to use the restroom. I was faced with a parenting conundrum I had yet to experience. Parking lots are not usually equipped with restrooms. In this case, the only choice was a port-a-potty (port-a-potty’s freak me out. I would rather get punched repeatedly in the stomach then be forced to enter one. Actually “using” one would be absolutely out of the question). This is never an issue with my boys. Boys can find a tree, bush (on occasion the side of one’s car) and relive their bladder quickly and effectively. In mere seconds, the crisis is averted and we can move on to non-potty related activities. In this case, I could not send the little girl to a nearby bush. Panicked (yes, panicked. This whole situation was new to me and I had no idea what to do), I sent her to her dad. Surely he had a magic solution that this boy mom had not thought of. That was not the case, he simply pointed to the port-a-potty across the parking lot.

I armed the little girl with everything I could think of.

Baby Wipes: They can clean almost anything
Hand Sanitizer: Self Explanatory
A little Prayer: Considering that my phobia would not allow me to get too close to the port-a-potty, she was going to need all the extra help she could get.

She did the impossible, and survived the port-a-potty (with virtually no help from me). Thank GOD I have little boys. I am positive the stress of the potty alone would do me in.

Note to dads: Using a port-a-potty is cruel and unusual punishment. It is NEVER okay for the penis-challenged!

Look what I found: www.go-girl.com

6 comments:

Your Mom said...

That's why you were in diaper until you were 14.

Stacie's Madness said...

i have a go girl, but haven't tried it out yet!

2 Toddlers and Me said...

Ugh, I'm with you on the paranoia of porta-potties. Yuck.

By the way, you have an award waiting for you on my blog. Congrats!

Sophia's Mom said...

Port=a-potties are a woman's worst nightmare! I can't believe that no one has come up with a better solution!

http://www.thewannabewahm.com

Susan Fobes said...

I was looking for some new sites and found yours through one of my followers. Very funn! I will be back.

Susan Fobes said...

By the way-no way will I use a porta potty and my daughter feels the same way. (Ah, I've trained her well...) This is one place you can actually see the germs all around you!