Things I've Learned Parenting Little Boys!

1. If you come across tiny underwear and are unsure rather or not their clean or dirty, DO NOT SMELL THEM to find out. Just assume they are dirty, put them in the laundry, and sanitize your hands immediately.


2. Farts are funny. Little boys will fart anywhere (including on you), in front of anyone (including your priest), and laugh about it hysterically. This condition lasts well into adulthood, and is contagious (I’m laughing now just thinking about farts: absolutely infected with inappropriate laughter)


3. Boys never stop moving, and their idle hands are the devils workshop. When not entertained, they pass their time by climbing, jumping, running, exploring, and throwing at Tasmanian Devil speed. They need things to do; your sanity (and quite possibly your home) depends on it.


4. Remote control obsession begins at birth (or close to it). I’m out numbered in my house, 4 to 1. If you are in a similar situation, just give in to Sunday football. It’s a war you will not win.


5. Never ask a (male) stranger for advice when purchasing an athletic cup. There is gesturing and pointing involved, that under any other circumstances would be considered inappropriate (it’s embarrassing all the same).


6. HotWheels are a safety hazard that only effects adults. Stepping on a HotWheel will undoubtedly leave you hopping around in pain (they are the male equivalent to Barbie shoes). Keep an eye out for them, there sneaky and show up unexpectedly.


7. Little boys are always hungry. ALWAYS! It doesn’t matter if they have eaten 5 minutes or 5 hours ago, they’re hungry. Keep snacks everywhere, you’ll never know when you need them.


8. Organized sports (Little League, Pop Warner, Soccer) will take over your life. Your weekends, and evenings will be dominated by cleats and coaches. Understanding and accepting this early with make the experience more enjoyable in the long run. You are now a mommy, and Super Fan (entertain yourself by figuring out ways to embarrass your husband and kids. It works wonderfully for me).


9. The penis obsession starts as soon as they find it (usually at a couple of months old), and if my husband is any indication…..it never ends.


10. They may be crazy, rough, and rude; but nobody loves mom like a little boy!

17 comments:

The Redhead Riter said...

LOL Thank God for little girls!

StaceyC4 said...

So true, so true!! I have two (besides my husband) and am totally outnumbered around here. I end up just scratching my head and wondering what they're thinking most of the time!

2 Toddlers and Me said...

Great post! I have a girl and a boy. He's only 2 so it looks like I have a lot to look forward too!

Stina said...

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Twincerely,Olga said...

Great post!! So true!I am up for newst blog award and would love your vote!

A Mom After God's Own Heart said...

I love this....I have 2 girls, and am the oldest of 6, so I loved checking out your life as a mom to boys:)

Following you from MBC....great blog!

Tammy said...

The remote obsession is so true. My son sits or lays on his bed with his remote in his hand. He doesn't put it down unless he is leaving his room.

Stacie's Madness said...

teehee...great post.

Slyde said...

awesome awesome post! i can relate!

3LittleMonkeys said...

Hi, I just stumbled across your blog and I love this post! I also have 3 boys and have experienced many of these things and I look forward (or not) to many more!

kaydee said...

You have written a wonderful piece that I will definitely take to heart--I have one boy and you are so right-they are the best! following from MBC follow me club.

Sophia's Mom said...

this post is just too funny! i have a little girl but i can definitely appreciate all of these things! glad i stopped by. had myself a good laugh!
:)
http://www.thewannabewahm.com

A Mom After God's Own Heart said...

Great list!

I have given you 2 blog awards!

Check them out on my blog:)

Lucia Phillips said...

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Anonymous said...

Superb! Superb! MYa its your little brother and i thought it was amazingly accurate.. and perfectly written.

kristilea said...

This post was just precious! It sounds exactly like my two boys (and my husband)! My closest friend has 5 boys and 2 girls. For a long time it was 5 to 1, and that one girl clinged to her mommy like her life depended upon it!

Mom of 3 Boys said...

That is so true.